I done read this here news story that says a women done bit her husband to death on account a he wouldn't have sex with her. Lordy sakes alive! I thank the good Lord me an' Festus Joe'll never have that problem. He ain't never said no to sex, even when he's down in his back and all.
I done plum fergot to do that there Friday Five last week on account a so many a them hurricanes was headin our way. But the weather ain't too bad this week so here it is:
1.How many TVs do you have in your home? I reckon this here is a trick qwestion. I don't know nobody gots more'n one TV. Oh wait a minute here. I do recall the one time Bosephus done found a bunch a TVs down to the dump and brung up down to the trailer. But none a them worked and he couldn't get 'em to show them movin' pitchure shows. So, we just used 'em fer planters and storage and whatnot.
2.On average, how much TV do you watch in a week? Let me see if I can figgure that one out. We watch Jerry Springer every day so that'd be five hours. We always gots to watch that Katie Colic and Matt Lawyer, so that's fifteen hours. Then we gots to watch the Tom Brokaw show. That's another five hours. We watch them Friends folks, that skinny red-haired lady who lives with the homosexual man and that there show with all them doctors that works in the ER who gots that homosexual woman as their boss. Them shows is all on that Must See TV station on Thursday nights. That's another two hours. Then we gots to watch Saturday Night Live on account a I gots me a crush on that Jimmy Falcon. Course we gots to watch that there E! True Hollywood Story a couple a times a week. We watch that there Trading Spaces every time it comes on the television. We watch that there Passions soap opera too when we can. When Bosephus can get the cable stole the right way, we watch that there show bout Tony the mob boss who goes to that there sikiatrist lady. Well, y'all, you's gonna have to do the math yerselves. I ain't too good at addin up numbers and whatnot.
3.Do you find that television is bad for young children? Lordy sakes no! Cletus T. just loves his television. He ain't got many joys in life, what with bein like one a them boy in the plastic bubble kids and all, but he don't miss his shows.
4.What shows do you HAVE to watch? I reckon I already answered that one.
5.If you had the power to create your own television network, what would your line-up look like? I'd put on all them shows I wrote about before plus some rasslin and NASCAR.
I a in't in no way affilitated
with no one by the name a trailer_park_honey. She's a liar and a thief.
That don't mean I'm sayin nuthin bad bout this here lady who's a right fine singer.
